Entertainment on the Saint Louis East Side
by Jack Corbett
Like it, love it, or leave it, one shouldn't ignore the adult entertainment scene St. Louis offers on its East Side, often called the Saint Louis Metro East, offers some of the wildest night life and strip clubs in the U.S. Just as the Saint Louis Gateway Arch stands as magnificent testimony to Saint Louis's monumental role to the settlement of the West and Union Station once prided itself on being the busiest rail center in the world, the adult scene on the Illinois side of the Mississippi is considered by many to be the center hub for exotic entertainment of all kinds for the entire U.S.
The club gave me my own phone line to be used only for internet use, and I'd sit six feet in front of the stage. Every Saturday night we'd have Dollies Trendy Toilet Sex, which amounted to a lot of people climbing into one of the Dollies topless club's rest rooms, customers, dancers, bartenders, and managers and just cutting up. Back in those days I was the only guy I knew of who had a digital camera and laptop and a lot of people caught onto that in the strip clubs I frequented while the rest of the world slept, slow and reluctant to catch onto all the new technologies we were putting out there, the internet, the digital camera, and the laptop computer.
The gentlemen's clubs are typically open until 4 a.m. on weekdays and 6 a.m. on weekends. Over at PT's Diamond Cabaret one can dine on gourmet fair that's on a par with what's served in some of St Louis's finest restaurants. Showgirls are featured here on a regular basis, particularly in the PT's clubs. And if staying up until 6 a.m. is not late enough for you, there's always Pops next door to PT's Sports and Diamond Cabaret which keeps its doors open twenty-four hours a day or Mustang Sallys over on route three on the way to the clubs in Brooklyn where you are likely to have an uproariously good time until 8 a.m. on Fridays and Saturdays.
The Saint Louis Metro East Adult Entertainment Scene is full of contradictions. Over on this side of the river men and women can find anything they want. Here you will find swinger's clubs, at least one club that specializes in men liking men, along with some of the finest gentlemen's clubs in the land. There's a seediness about certain areas with their massage parlors, adult book stores and other adult establishments you might want to stay out of. Such seediness might deter you from experiencing what the finer establishments offer
Gentlemen's Clubs are called Gentlemen's Clubs for very good reasons most fail to even think about. That hypocritical segment of our society I call "The Mothers for a More Boring Nation" point accusing fingers at club owners--"You guys just call your clubs gentlemen's clubs to whitewash all that smut you stand for." The truth is, the well-run establishments are gentlemen's clubs for men who choose to behave like gentlemen. These places are for the discerning guy who wants to escape from the hard nosed unforgiving battleground of the business world, everyday tedium, and the boredom, snobbishness, and pretentiousness he typically experiences in other kinds of bars. Just consider the following facts:
I. Believe it or not, one is far safer in a gentlemen's club than in most other bars. The mere fact that such clubs are often referred to as titty bars, topless, or bottomless clubs means that many conservative elements of our society want to close them down. This means that the club owner has to make every effort to insure the safety of his guests to avoid the serious risk of getting shut down. A well managed club is ready for trouble and its staff is usually prepared to deal with it before it gets out of hand. Your typical non-adult type of bar on the other hand often experiences fights simply because its owner does not share the same degree of risk of being closed down. Trouble often develops in regular bars and even when a fight is imminent no one does anything about it until it's too late. Parking lots are usually well lit at the better adult establishments and there are usually cameras both inside and outside the club that is constantly monitoring what's happening both inside and outside the nightclub.
2. A man is much better off bringing a date into a gentlemen's club than he is in many other types of bars, particularly if his date is much younger than he is. Let me give you a good example. I took an attractive woman out to lunch to a bar-restaurant just down the street from where I live. The woman was over twenty years younger than me. We took a table a few feet from the bar where we ordered our food from the waitress. A very drunk young guy came over from the bar and sat down with us and started to run his mouth. The establishment did nothing about it and I had to resort to being very rude to the drunk to get him to leave. This could have easily developed into a fight. This kind of event rarely occurs in a gentlemen's club. For one thing most of the entertainers are a lot younger than most of the male patrons so it's not unusual for an older guy to be sitting with a very young attractive female. And once again, should trouble start to develop, the club's going to nip it in the bud.
3. There isn't nearly the amount of snobbery, pretentiousness, or cliquishness in gentlemen's clubs as there is in other bars and nightclubs. Face it, most of the women here have their clothes off to one degree or another. Talk about baring oneself. Most of the male patrons are risking disapproval from the public simply by being here in the first place. So everyone's in the same boat. There's simply no need to put on airs and most people simply don't. There's a general atmosphere in gentlemen's clubs that goes like this....."Most are not going to approve of what any of us are doing here in the first place, so let's just move onto the more important things in life such as having a great time."
4. The music's far better in gentlemen's clubs. Today's popular music is geared to the very young and I suppose this has been the case for at least the last thirty years or so. Most patrons of gentlemen's clubs are over thirty. Therefore a club's DJ's has to serve up music that's appealing to his clientelle and not for the young and dumb.
5. There's a lot more pretty women in gentlemen's clubs than there are in other kinds of bars. I am reminded of a guy around fifty who captains a tug boat for a barge line. He's the classic thirty days on and thirty days off kind of guy who works on the Mississippi. We were talking about why we enjoy going to gentlemen's clubs and he said this: "You know Jack, I used to go to those other kinds of bars and it was always the same kind of shit. There's a lot more guys than gals in them and it's always five or six guys who are chasing the same drunk bimbo. And there's always all those stupid fights breaking out all around you. So I started going to titty bars and suddenly I'm surrounded by all these gorgeous gals. And there's no more fights breaking out all the time. I doubt if I am going to wind up marrying any of these gals but I can enjoy having a few beers while cutting up with them. Then for awhile I stopped going to the titty bars and it was back to the same boring shit again. I'll never hang out in regular bars again."
6. The degree and quality of social interaction is far superior in a gentlemen's club than it is in most "regular bars". There's all kinds of bars and nightclubs to be experienced out there. The typical neighborhood tavern is typically filled with a bunch of guys from the area who are simply out to get drunk at the lowest possible cost without having to drive very far. Many of them are three sheets to the wind during the daytime. One's typical experience in such places are...."Same old shit. I completely wasted my time talking to those fools." On the other end of the spectrum are the upper caste establishments found in the well to do sections of L.A., Chicago, and St. Louis that you might call yuppie bars. The snobbery and stuffiness in such places is so thick you can cut it with a knife. Then there's the pickup places or meat market bars. It is in such places that you are likely to encounter the largest number of total idiots. Contrast such places to the well run gentlemen's club where a man is going to feel safer, have a lot more pretty women around him, where the music's far better, and in which everyone in general really doesn't care much about the public image he/she presents. The whole atmosphere becomes all about everyone having a great time and having lots of fun while doing it. Here you are more likely to find free spirits such as yourself. It's in the best gentlemen's clubs where you are likely to find the writers, the engineers, the true artists not to mention men who are truly successful in the business world. It's here where you are likely to rub elbows with all kinds of fascinating people, including hordes of enticing women. And if you stop and think too long that none of this seems to be going anywhere, just stop and consider that we are all going to wind up dead anyway. Such is the ultimate meaning of life so it's not really going to matter anyway. So let us all enjoy this train we are all traveling on and grab all the gusto we can.
One more thing......This site is not just about the Saint Louis Metro East Adult Entertainment Scene. This huge multi billion dollar industry that encompasses more than 2500 clubs should be savored wherever you find yourself, in all its aspects. Enjoy.
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