Horror Scopes by Nostrildumass
January 2003 Predictions For most of you 2003 will be a welcome reprieve from 2002.... Anything is better than last year.... If you had a great year in 2002.... Fuck you !!! I'll do anything in my power so that this year is not a kiss-my-ass happy re-run of some "Leave It To Beaver" episode that would make my dick soft wacking to my favorite Disney porn !!!! Gracious me ... Was I raving ? .... Predictions: 1) I still cannot be President.... Not the United States, not the local 4-H club... Sorry about the sheep thing , Jack dared me !!!!
OK enough with the predicktions (intentionally mispelled for a change) ... Let's cut to the chase... (What the fuck does that mean anyway?) January, 2003
|
It is here
where you cannot escape |
||
|
||
You are a fire sign.... BURN !!! BURN !!! BURN !!! I have limited experiance
with Aries people as far as I know.... So you're either really unnoticable
or all of you need to come out of the Aries closet !!!! Shit it's just
your birth sign, it has nothing to do with the 666 birthmark on your ass.... |
||
You guys rule !!!! You got Halloween, damn near Thanksgiving, and you put out !!!! For everyone !!!! Let everyone you fuck know they're just a number and that way you stand less of a chance getting gunned down in your sleep!!!! |
||
If April showers bring May flowers, what do Mayflowers bring? .... Pilgrams !!!! Quit hanging out so close to the Aries fucks .... They're sucking the life right out of you.... Take a stand... Moon a cop !!!! |
||
Ahhh yes ... The twins.... Are there really twins or is one of the voices in your head just louder than the rest ?!!!! Everybody likes you because you are bi-sexual.... Hey , it should be easier to keep your dance card full !!!! |
||
You're basically a good , kind person who drinks to much and wakes up in the wrong house frequently.... Your strong suit is that during the span of your sign is THE FOURTH OF JULY..... Party on dudes !!!! |
||
Shit, would you stand up for yourselves !!!! Pick your battles, not your ASS !!!! For a refreshing change... Be the one who goes to the busiest truck stop , shits in the sink, and wipes their ass on the roll towel.... Wake up... People are using you !!!! |
||
Your kiss ass attitude has absolutely no one fooled.... You are a cut throat piece of shit who would set a nun on fire if it would get you a job promotion !!!! Some day you'll find happiness when you get the top job RUNNING THE GATES TO HELL !!!! |
||
Your primadonna attitude is what makes you think you're cool.... Look around ... If you ain't sucking dick , people disappear real fast after they catch a self-rightious, holyer-than-thou, obvious bullshit scenario on how you're here for the greater purpose.... Keep it to yourself , you sound much better gagging on my cock....
|
||
You would say anything or do anything to get in the pants of whoever your hormones tell you... You're harder to detect than a Leo , because you are a player.... Game on !!!!
Until
next time.... Look to the stars and shoot the moon.... |
||