• Just don't try to worm into her life. The worm got there first.

•  Do not drive a nice car around her. Instead get a $300 car that proudly announces your arrival as a leech

• If you have a job, hide it from her

• Do not be nice to her since she will only think you want to fuck her. Instead be mean and cruel so she will think you are being sincere.

• Woo her with drugs, then cement the deal by threatening to cut her off once you get her hooked. (Does not work on all victims susceptible to leeches)

• Act helpless so your topless dancer girlfriend will think she needs to fix you...posing as a drug addict, alcoholic, homeless, and/or chronically unemployed will help here. (See Corbett's masterwork "Goodbye Darwin)

• Ask her for her money whenever possible and never, never volunteer your own since she will not respect you

• Never be gallant in any manner and whatever you do, don't open doors for her, send her flowers, pull out her chair for her, etc

• Make it a habit to always be late. If you arrive on time she will think you are weak

• Get her pregnant as fast as you can. She will feel eternally grateful to you for ruining the rest of her life

• Never forget that the main reason for your miserable existence is to get your victims pregnant so you now have a job of babysitting the baby leeches while the bread winner is working to support everyone else. But take heart even though down you know you are not worth a shit. You get to fulfill your life's ambition to watch television while drinking the beer someone else has paid for while pretending  that you are important (after all, you are now a father).

Check out Dancer 2 and her leech escort 

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