The
two Missouri club owners complement each other, each man drawing on the strengths
of the other. Ishmael is usually smiling and supportive of those around him,
having the uncanny ability few men have of reassuring those around him–"I'm
on your team and with you all the way." But Big Daddys the man with the
mouth, a big bear of a man who's unstoppable once he gets his golden tongue
going, equally clever on the microphone (he's a D.J. by profession and one of
the best you will ever hear) as he is in person. He had also been a professional
wrestler, which is one of the many reasons Big Daddys Saturday night wrestling
matches are such a howling success. Here they wrestle in everything imaginable
including hot buttered popcorn, hot oil, jello, mashed potatoes and gravy, rice
pudding, and soul food.
Each Saturday night Killer Chloe and one of the club's other dancers take on
a young serviceman based at Fort Leonard Wood, which is just two miles from
the club. Although Chloe is one of the club's best dancers, it's the ring she
lives for. To lose is unthinkable. Like many of the men she wrestles, Cloey
has served her time in the U.S. Army which is well represented by Fort Leonard
Wood home to 45,000 military personnel, which supplies Big Daddys with a very
vocal crowd which strongly identifies with Killer Chloe who it regards as half
mother and half goddess.
Big
Mike is perhaps Iowa's answer to Big Daddy. An extremely outgoing man, Big Mike
is all about promotion. Like Big Daddy, he sees tackling the unusual as plain
good management since he sees providing great entertainment as something all
clubs should aspire to. Both men are good ole country boys, who know how to
both show and give a good time.
Before
the fight begins, Leah Layne manages to enrage Dirty Heather because of her
obvious preference for the Missouri girl. Still holding onto her championship
wrestling belt she's going to have to discard once the fight begins, Heather
tries to bash Big Daddy in the mouth with the heavily studded strip of leather
and metal when the man on the mic announces how Cloey is going to tear her from
limb to limb. Heather misses and hits Krazy Ted in the face. The thick strip
of leather, which must weigh at least fifteen pounds, splits open Ted's face
which starts squirting blood down his cheeks and onto his chest.
It
is obvious that Heather's the stronger of the two women. But Killer Chloe's
ring generalship and knowledge of wrestling holds is superior to Heather's.
Much of the time the two women are crawling on all fours around each other in
the hot oil, like two jungle cats, each one seeking the right opening to deal
a death blow to its prey. Each girl is quick to get at the other, but the slipperiness
of the oil makes it nearly impossible for either to get a good hold on the other.
Evenutally
Killer Choe is able to pin Heather but only for a second. But Leah Layne, anxious
to hand the fraternal order of the U.S. military its victory quick counts the
temporarily prostrate Heather as she slaps the surface of the ring three times
in rapid succession. There is no one to stand up for Heather who's been robbed
except for Paine, who rushes into the ring where she starts to grapple with
the former Miss Nude of Illinois and M.S. Texas. The bouncers are on the shapely
blonde within seconds who carry her kicking and screaming out of the club.
The
championship belt is passed onto Killer Chloe who has been joined in the ring
by an entertainer friend of hers, Mad Macy. For a few moments Macy holds her
friend's arm clutching the belt aloft in victory. Macy being taller and stronger
than Kloey starts to feel that the wrong woman's been given the opportunities
in the ring to represent the great state of Missouri. When Cloey's least expecting
it, Macy knocks her friend into the hot oil, and pins her. For reasons that
have yet to be explained Leah Layne dives forward onto all fours and quick counts
Kloey out.
A new champion has emerged. But this one's won by deceit and treachery. Two
worthy competitors, Killer Chloe and Dirty Heather, both representing the flower
of American womanhood fought tooth and nail to a tie in this magazine's opinion
only to be robbed by an unscrupulous usurper, ""Merciless Macy".
It has been one of the bleakest moments in American sports History and one that
must be avenged through a rematch. Our challenge has been answered with both
Big Daddys and the Lumberyard agreeing that the fights must continue on Saturday,
October 4th, this time at the Lumberyard in Des Moines, Iowa.
The
case of Iowa has been championed by Big Mike, who has recently said: "We
have a very large club that is ideal for wrestling bouts of this kind. Heather
who is far stronger than Cloey was robbed in Missouri where the spirit of Jesse
James and his fellow robbers lives on. What they did to her is criminal. Thankfully
Big Daddy and Ishmael are much more fair minded than the rest of Missouri and
have agreed to a rematch up here on our home turf. As for Mad Macy—She's
a nobody who has done nothing in the ring. We will pit her against the Lumberyard's
own champion, "Pounding Susie" who is going to make Macy wish she
had moved down across the Mexican border.
Meanwhile,
Big Daddy sees it another way having recently leaked to the press: "Our
wrestlers down here are the best in the entire nation. We are the Show Me State.
Missouri football has a great record of glorious victories. We are asking Iowa
to put up its best female wrestlers and we will waste no time by sending our
team up there to settle this matter once and for all."
