Peter the Great--The Golden Odyssey Episode IV
"The people are going to love me for this," Peter the Great said to God.
by Jack Corbett
As he wrung his hands with anticipation. "The feature entertainers are about to arrive."
This was the maiden run of the "Golden Odyssey", the first of Peter's super trains that would link the major cities of the U.S. within four years. Six years after that most of the nation's small towns would be linked if all went according to plan. Just building the train cars, engines, terminals (stations would now be called terminals), and monorails would keep hundreds of thousands employed and this didn't even count the huge numbers of shops, nightclubs, restaurants, and other establishments millions of others would wind up building to service the new national transport system.
"We are in for a real treat, said God. This is just the first piece of the huge puzzle we are building. And we are on its trial run. New York to Lost Angeles-2780 miles, actually we are leaving from Manhattan, in just eighteen and a half hours. That's good for a 150 mile per hour average although this train can reach speeds of up to 200 miles an hour. But it has to make stops to pick up and to leave off passengers. By the time this run is over we are going to wish this damn train went slower."
"Please God, said Peter. "You are swearing again. What is everyone going to think?"
"It doesn't really matter. You are going to be their ruler. I'm just God."
"It's a long haul going all the way from New York to California. People are used to doing it in jets. Waiting in lines in airports, having their luggage lost by the airlines, planes delayed because of minor problems, weather diverting flights. None of that is going to happen with our new system. Still, when everything goes right, people are in the air for only six hours. But they are going to have so much fun on our new trains that they are going to want them to go slower."
"You are a genius, Peter. People are going to start slowing down a bit so that they can smell the roses."
"I'm going to make this a drug free workforce," said Peter. The people we hire to work on the new train system are going to have to be drug free. If they are not, they are just going to have to get jobs doing something else."
"One thing they are not going to get hired for is smuggling and selling illegal drugs," said God. "Since you made all drugs illegal," there has been no such thing as a drug pusher anymore. You crushed the Columbian economy and all the drug overlords over there by simply moving production over here."
"Yep. All nice and legal too. No more drug related crime. No murders on account of drugs. And no prostitution just so women have to lie on their backs with their legs spread to earn enough to buy their drugs. They are all dirt cheap now. Even heroin."
"I predict that fewer and fewer young people will be doing drugs. Now that they are legal it's not so cool anymore to be doing them. They can do as much as they want wherever they want but some of the best jobs require drug testing for them to get them and if they are found doing drugs or having recently done drugs they are just simply shit out of luck," said God.
The Golden Odyssey had coach cars, classic Pullman cars, and modern sleeper cars, two night club cars and a single restaurant car. The Pullman cars were called Pullman Classics. Each car was lined on both sides of the aisle with a row of sleeping berths. These were on two levels, bunk bed style. Each bunk had a heavy curtain that could be pulled closed to give its occupant privacy. At each end of the car there were two unisex bathrooms to be shared by the car's occupants. The modern sleeper cars contained a series of roomettes lined in two rows just like the Pullman berths. Each roomette had two comfortable chairs in it facing each other which could be converted to the lower bed of a bunk bed when the occupants decided to call it quits for the night. The upper bed could be pulled down from the ceiling. There were four small bathrooms in the front and the rear of each car just as there were in the Pullman Classic Cars. Most of the cars were the standard coach cars having no special provisions for sleeping. One of the night club cars was simply a bar car. A single bartender sold drinks to his patrons who sat or stood around small tables. The other night club car was worthy of the name nightclub. Most of one side of the entire car was made of a tough acrylic compound resembling glass. Its ceiling was black. Sprinkled throughout the ceiling of the car were small white lights that looked like stars against the black background. Padded chairs and couches furnished a place where guests could lounge comfortably while watching the scenery outside flashing by them through the clear acrylic side of the car. The car was spectacularly impressive at night. There was a bar at one end and there was a slender waitress with a new boob job helping the car's bartender serve its patrons.
It was around 9 p.m. when the train just left Cleveland, Ohio, that the feature entertainers arrived at the more impressive of the two night club cars. There were three of them. They had worked at the best gentlemen's clubs in the U.S. and although there were no stages in the car, there was ample opportunity for them to slide and slither their way through the patrons. One of them got on the microphone to play master of ceremonies as the three started to get part naked.
What most of the passengers didn't know is that the Golden Odyssey had actually hired twenty feature entertainers. By now the other seventeen women were making their rounds throughout the cars, giving particular attention to the Pullman Classic Cars as people started heading to their berths. They had been hired to start small parties wherever they went. The girls went from car to car in twos and threes carrying bottles of liquor of various persuasions. One girl would be carrying a half pint of Hot Damn while another would be parading around with a fifth of tequila asking people to drink out of shot glasses with her. The seventeen entertainers eventually wound up in three of the Pullman Classic Cars where they were able to successfully get nearly half of the occupants to stay up all night drinking with them.
"Well this is certainly going to be hitting the media big time," gloated God with a huge smile on his face.
"You bet," said Peter. "Did you see that New York Times reporter following all those features around with his camera?'
"Sure did, and he wasn't the only reporter with a camera."
"Well, all of this is going to make my new transportation program very popular, which is why I hired all those feature entertainers in the first place," said Peter.
"Not to mention all the jobs this whole thing will be creating."
"We are going to have to be creating one helluva lot of jobs on account of all the lawyers, judges, and police officers and countless others running the country's police forces and judicial system who will be losing theirs because of our legalizing all the drugs not to mention my ongoing war against the judicial system that will wind up throwing out all the frivolous cases litigants and their lackey attorneys keep coming up with," said Peter. "But these will be real jobs. Not just phoney jobs filled by men and women making it their business to harass U.S. citizens."
"This is the carrot alright or shall we say it's just the tip of the huge carrot you are dangling in front of your future subjects, Peter. When are you going to start pulling out the stick?"
"Next week, God. We will be having our first public executions next week. But they are going to be very popular."
"Yes. I already know about them."
"How do you know?" asked Peter.
"Because I am God. You keep seeming to forget that."
The Peter the Great Episodes
The Peter the Great Reincarnation Pages introduction
Episode 1--Mission from God--July 2002
Episode 2--Peter the Great becomes President--August 2002
Peter the Great, The Birth of the new Praetorian Guard--August 2002
Peter the Great--The Golden Odyssey--October 2002
Peter the Great and the Coliseum--November 2002
Peter the Great finds out about Father Joseph--January 2003
God and the Lawyers--March 2003
Peter the Great takes Revenge on the Spammers--April 2003
Shootout at Peter's Corral--May 2003
Peter takes on organized Crime on the Internet--May 2003
Peter the Great, Introducing Lotharina the Vamp--June 2003
Peter the Great--The Vampire Side of Lotharina--July 2003
Peter the Great--The Seduction of Sergei--August 2003
