Category Archives: Exreme Satire

On my website at alphapro.com I promised over the top satire and cutting edge photography and video. Here it is, a lot of it in video. While two of the six books I have written and published–“Dick Fitswell the Man in Quest for the Perfect Fit” and “Pattaya Pattaya Pattaya Confessions of Sin City” take no prisoners. In both books nothing is sacred. Especially organized religion.

Prudish YouTube censors gun down two Jack Corbett videos

Prudish YouTube censors gunned down two of my Jack Corbett Productions videos four years ago.   

Prudish YouTube censors would disallow this picture because Gee and Nikky are too beautiful for YouTube
Prudish YouTube censors would disallow this picture because Gee and Nikky are too beautiful for YouTube

So my videos at YouTube were obviously getting too dangerous for general public consumption at nearly 1,300,000 views.  According to the Mothers for A More Boring Nation prudish YouTube censors both videos committed the same heinous crime.  By showing groups of slender attractive Thai women dancing and having a good time in both of these Pattaya beer bars.

This video was getting over 7000 views a day. Until the YouTube chapter of the Mothers for a more Boring nation censored it.

How Prudish YouTube censors can destroy anyone’s video audience in four days.

Now let me show you what Prudish YouTube censors can accomplish. The graph below shows my popular video’s daily views plummeting from over 6000 per day to 500 in four days and  to less than 100 over the next several months.

Prudish YouTube censors

I shot this video at the Skytop Guest House and Internet cafe five years ago. An Australian, owned the place.  After Pete died, his widow, Wan, took Skytop over.  And Wan turned a bar just outside Skytop into a successful beer bar.   Then the greedy landlords  put the whole section of buildings up for sale. Five years later the entire section is still boarded off, and unsold. Everyone had to move, including Dr. Belen who had her medical office in this complex. 

Most of the women in this video will never work together again while my tailor had to move his shop. The video was generating 6000 hits a day until the Prudish YouTube censors struck.

A Mothers for a boring Nation prude must have complained to YouTube which immediately classified it as an adult movie. I have no idea of who complained or why.

Perhaps it was the underage gal in the video. Which would be Wan’s daughter who is not working in the bar or drinking.  Years later Wan’s daughter earned a four year university degree.  And now she’s teaching school.  My Thai girlfriend is in this video and she’s not working at a bar either. One of my favorite waitresses who used to work at the Girl Beer Bar in Naklua is also in this video. This video shows a lot of friends having a great time. There’s no nudity whatsoever. I don’t know. Maybe it’s the cute girl shaking her butt to the music that caused someone to complain to YouTube. Which drove the Prudish YouTube censors to classify this video as an adult movie.

If only Hitler and his Nazi minions had YouTube censorship eighty years ago.  They could have purged all voices of dissent to extinction in one month.

There would be no need for concentration camps or gas chambers, firing squads or torturing the opposition. The mechanism is simple.

Most people are unthinking, lazy automatons who believe what they hear from any seemingly well meaning organization whether it’s the Nazis, the Republicans, Facebook, You Tube or Google.  Which owns You Tube. So if I am able to control Google I am able to control what the entire world sees, hears and believes by restricting my content.

The fact is that when you age restrict a YouTube video most people will not want to have to sign in with their email address to attest  they are over 21. And if you don’t believe that, you had better look at that graph again.

Which now bring up how the Prudish YouTube censors destroyed my audience in the second YouTube video

Two of the girls, Pai and Tri are friends of ours.  My girlfriend and I had called Pai to invite her to a party at the Pen Bar and Pai brought Tri along with her. It’s Tri and Pai who are doing the most dancing in this video. I had known both Pai and Tri for years, and  my girlfriend and I were plying them with alcohol at this party. Neither was working for the Pen bar so I really don’t understand how You Tube could possibly claim this content was adult or improper.

Nevertheless the Mothers for a More Boring Nation misfits flagged the video which brought it to the attention of Prudish YouTube censors.  Who decided to age restrict the video by requiring potential viewers to sign in with their email addresses that they were over 21 .

The bottom line for their doing this is that certain people were jealous of the attractive sexy Thai women dancing in the video.

Some of these might have been women. On the other hand they might be men who are upset  because they will never be able to be with some of the women in the video or other women who look a lot like them due to their having a wife and kids at home or not having enough money to travel to such places as Thailand where sexy attractive women still exist.

One thing’s for sure, though, and that is there’s nothing pornographic about this video. In fact it’s about as far from deserving an R rating as a Mickey Mouse cartoon,

and if you don’t believe me, just check out this video for yourselves and make up your own mind. As for me, I’m thinking of changing this video’s meta tags over at YouTube to include such key words as adult rated, ultra sensuous, too wild for You Tube and so forth. After all, if YouTube says this video is adult and requires people to attest to their not being children by signing in with their email addresses.    Then obviously this video has to be adult.

Here’s the exact email I just got from You Tube. Pay attention though to the bold test which will tell you all you need to know about You Tube’s censorship policies.

Regarding your account:Jack Corbett

The YouTube Community has flagged one or more of your videos as inappropriate. Once a video is flagged, it is reviewed by the YouTube Team against our Community Guidelines. Upon review, we have determined that the following video(s) contain content that may not be suitable for all viewers: As a result, we have age-restricted this content.

What the email says is that whatever Prudish YouTube censors don’t agree with will be age restricted.

Let me emphasize the key words here, “contain certain content that may not be suitable for all viewers.” Well here’s what I got to say about that.

 Returning to my home here in Thailand yesterday afternoon from a two week trip to the U.S., I was appalled.  And horrified to find that Americans had gotten to be fatter than ever.

On one flight alone, from Phoenix to Seattle there was only one woman on the plane who wasn’t fat. Most were what I’d call obese. It is a fact, and you can check this out on the internet if you don’t believe me.    The average weight of Americans has risen twenty-five pounds over what Americans used to weight twenty-five years ago. And on that flight, most of the women  were human sausages.

Now I think all YouTube videos depicting women and men as human sausages should be age restricted.

I would like to appoint a group of my Pattaya based friends  to a YouTube panel of judges. I will empower my judges to age restrict any videos they don’t agree with. That way I can be a paragon of virtue. And to be able to accomplish what is really best for my fellow Americans. I can then get my judges flag all YouTube videos that I dislike.  And have my panel of friends age restrict these videos.

So where shall we start?  Well….first of all I think it is a matter of public interest that all YouTube videos that show fat people should be flagged.

We don’t need to have fat people in the movies posing as role models for young people today.  After all too many of our young men are obese as it is.  And we certainly don’t want to have any more fat kids who are unable to pass our military services’ physical fitness tests.  Now don’t laugh.  This is a matter of our nation’s national security.

These  YouTube judges  must certify only those videos that show physically fit, slender young men and women.   And age restrict all videos that show the unfit, and overweight sad sacks that are poor examples of American might.

The reason for doing this is that we will achieve a real measuring stick for what men and women need to look like.  The way they appeared for thousands of years before television, the internet, three cars in every garage and fast food transformed  them into a bunch of couch potatoes who are barely able to walk across the street.

Only then can we produce the same kind of physically fit cannon fodder that the United States was able to field during World War I and II.

As it is, Americans are the laughing stock of the world.   Just remember that I live in Thailand.  And even though the Thais and practically everyone else in this world are getting fat, the U.S. still leads the pack.

When Thais and other Asians think of Americans they see them as grossly overweight creatures who need golf karts  to get them from one end of the supermarket to the other.

As for me, it’s really starting to get embarrassing.  That’s because whenever someone asks me where I come from, I keep telling him I’m from Canada.  Or from somewhere else where people believe in still getting a little exercise to keep their weight down.

I really dislike Chinese. I find that most Chinese are rude, unscrupulous, arrogant pricks who are among the most uncreative people on earth. When they produce anything it’s usually of such cheap quality that it falls apart in one tenth the time that American and German products disintegrate into worthless junk. They are good at copying and selling products that other countries originated and that’s about it. They are dirty and their morals are truly in the basement. And the Chinese sell children’s toys laden with poison.  Their cars, trucks and coal burning furnaces pollute the earth.  And their waterways and beaches are choked with polluted garbage.

So in my videos that I  allow on YouTube with no age restriction will not have any Chinese in them. Why by the time I get done you will think  that Chinese food is inedible.

We won’t show any fat people either. And no fast food restaurants. And while my chosen group of  Prudish YouTube censors are at it, we will purge all videos of anyone drinking beer or overeating.  Meanwhile we will allow without restriction any videos that show people exercising and eating wholesome and healthy foods can accomplish.

So when me and my friends put ourselves on the You Tube Board of censors

We will be able to restrict the number of viewers that will be able to view fat people or Chinese to less than 2 percent of what they would otherwise be.   

Don’t believe me?  Just remember, most of you are sheep.  Therefore you are hopeless non thinking automatons who are too lazy to actually think for yourselves.

In the meantime Jack Corbett Productions no longer has to put up with Prudish YouTube censors.  Fortunately I did not cut any corners with my Alpha Productions web site.  Which has the power to stream video the same way YouTube does.   Here’s too examples the Prudish YouTube censors banned which you can now view from Alpha Productions whether you have a smart phone or computer.

And my non cruelty cockfighting video YouTube purged because of complaints from Non thinking human rights activists.