Category Archives: Pattaya Beer Bars

The typical beer bar is an open air affair that often fronts out to a street or sidewalk. Both the beers and the ladies are usually cheaper here than in the go go bars.

Go go bars have become rip-off Pattaya clip joints

Pattaya clip joints are  go go bars which relentlessly pressure their customers to buy lady’s drinks at high prices.   Over the past few years Pattaya go go bars have entered a downward spiral that offer their customers the worse of all worlds.   First off, there’s the drinking experience itself in which go go dancers descend upon their customer victims like vultures whose single minded goal is to extract as many high priced drinks from each customer victim as possible.   Then there’s the sexual experience, which if there is any, is about the highest priced one can find in a city that offers so many better options.    Lastly there’s the main reason that attracts so many men to Pattaya in the first place which is to empower one’s manhood.   More often than not,  the customer feels so taken advantaged of that he feels as if he’s been de-balled.   I want to describe this form of clip joint activity in three steps. 1. How go go bars used to be run in the good old days, 2. How they are run now, and 3. What recently happened to me at a Pattaya Go Go bar that is far from Walking Street and much closer to Sois 7 and Soi 5.

The Man tour
Since coming to Thailand with the Mantour, most Pattaya go go bars have become Pattaya clip joints in which coyote bar girls are compelled to ram 50 ladies drinks down their customers throats every 10 days.

1. The way things used to be in the good old days

A few years ago, when I went to go go bars,  the basic concept of ladies drinks was to break the ice between a go go girl whose English skills were usually not very good and prospective customers wishing to buy her out of the bar. Whether in Bangkok or in Pattaya the scenario went like this.  A customer comes into the go go bar.  The girls dancing on the stage are all wearing numbers.  When the customer is interested in one of the girls he either gets her attention by motioning  her to come over and have a drink with him or he tells a waitress or the mamasan to have number 17 (for example) to join him for a drink.  The girl soon joins him for a drink.  The potential customer will then often negotiate a price with her for either short time or long time.  This was usually around 1000 baht although I’ve had a couple go go girls willing to go home with me for 500 baht.  If a waitress or mamasan entered into such discussions at all it was usually to interpret for the customer what the go go girl was telling him or explaining to the go go girl what the customer was saying. Back in those good old days, the waitresses and mamasans would typically leave the negotiated price between the customer and the girl.

This is what we looked forward to in the old days when the promises of the Man Tour experience also applied to the Pattaya go go bars.

Although Pattaya is still probably the best place to be on earth for all those boy-girl adventures we all dream about,  most go go bars have become  Pattaya clip joints.

2. In the new clip joint era of today

The customer gets absolutely the worse drinking–female companionship type of experience one can possibly imagine.   Sadly the  go go bars here have become Pattaya clip joints.  Thanks to the coyote bar girl epidemic taking over Pattaya go go bars, customers are constantly being pummeled to buy one ladies drink after another at a machine gun pace. The go go girls typically have 10 day contracts with the go go bars that require the girls to sell at least 50 ladies drinks every 10 days.  So here you are in one of the Pattaya clip joints.  You are out with several friends wanting to have a relaxing night out on the town. You probably also are wanting to take an attractive girl home with you to empower your manhood. Our tour guide told us was the best thing about Thai women when I first visited Thailand with the Man Tour was that Thai women empowered a man’s manhood.   But that was 12 years ago. Today in most of Pattaya’s go go bars the customer winds up having his manhood dismembered.  He winds up feeling humiliated while his wallet has a deep hole in it.

Here’s what happens.  Especially if he’s assessed by the mamasan or go go dancers as being new to the go go scene.   The first girl descends on him like a bird of prey.  What happens next is that either the girl, waitress, or mamasan immediately asks him to buy a ladies drink. This is typically synthetic orange juice.  Since there’s no alcohol in it the girl can easily consume practically unlimited quantities of such cheap stuff at 140 baht or more a pop.  The next step is for the mamasan or waitress to ask the victim for a ladies drink also.  Chances are the customer has ordered a beer for himself at say 140 baht so when he buys the waitress and the bar girl one ladies drink each he’s out 420 baht already.  At this point he’s only five minutes into this ball game.  So what happens next?  The go go girl’s sister makes an immediate appearance. The go go girl now asks him: “Buy drink for sister me?” Chances are the go go girl’s English is absolutely dreadful so if you think you are going to get any fun filled dialogue out of these girls, forget it.  So you buy the sister (who 90 percent of the time is not the girl’s sister) an orange juice looking ladies drink.  You are now out nearly 600 baht. The object of your fond desires now asks you for a second ladies drink. If you politely refuse she will most likely leave you within the next 10 minutes so to keep the ball game in play you comply hoping you are going to have sex with her later on.  By this time you are buying yourself a second beer or a Tequila.  Within the first 20 minutes your bar bill is over 1000 baht.  For this kind of money you could already be banging a Soi Six girl, but never mind.  If you are onto the fact that this is their ball game and not yours, you indicate to the girl, waitress or mamasan that you want to make boom boom with the girl.  Now comes the bad news. It’s before midnight.  The go go bar wants the girl to get even more ladies drinks out of suckers like you.  So her bar fine is 1500 baht.  You are also informed that you must pay at least 2000 baht just to short time the girl.  You can wait for midnight to come of course and then you will be getting this magnificent deal of getting to bar fine this vulture for just 1000 baht.  But if you stay at this go go bar until midnight chances are you will be paying a lot more than the 500 baht you would be saving by going after the cheaper bar fine.  Say you go for it and decide to bar fine her straight off.  Let’s see.  You’ve probably already run a drink tab of at least 1000 baht.  You wind up having to pay a 2000 tip to the girl for sex and you get to pay the bar a 1500 baht bar fine. So you wind up paying 4500 baht for just one hour of sex and you might just have to pay at least 300 baht for a short time room on top of all that. Your total price for having sex with this women amounts to 4800 baht which comes out to about $140.00 in American money. And if this is not bad enough, she now either can go back to the go go bar to find another sucker like you or she will go back to celebrate with her Thai boyfriend.  And trust me, over 90 % of all Pattaya go go girls have Thai boyfriends.

3. In the go go bar that’s between Soi 5 and Soi 7.

You can take the girls to an upstairs room for 500 baht here.  So the convenience here is much better than it is down on Walking Street. There’s also no bar fine per se.  Which is a big plus.  Over one year ago I banged my first and only go go girl from this particular establishment.  The girl asked 1000 baht for short time sex. But when I pointed out to her that the price of the room was 200 baht too high compared to the competition I got her to ask me just 800 baht for her tip.  But a few months after that I heard that this go go bar was charging 1500 baht for bar fines.  So I later asked the go go bar owner what the club’s policy was on bar fines and what I must pay to have sex with the girls. I understood the man to tell me that customers had to pay 500 baht to use the upstairs rooms, but as for what the go go girls got for their “tips” this was a matter that was strictly between them and their customers.  So–if a girl was happy with getting 1000 baht from me such as the girl I had taken upstairs before, that was fine with this go go bar owner.

Several weeks later, I had one of the girls drinking with me. I offered her 1000 baht to have sex with her. And if she didn’t speak English well enough to understand me, I made it very clear that I’d be paying the bar 500 baht for the room upstairs and 1000 baht to her by making repeated hand signals and gestures towards her and the upstairs. She agreed to my offer so I told the mamasan that I was paying my bill and bar fining the girl. The mamasan then presented me a bill that included the girl’s tip at 2000 baht. “No, No, No.” I told the mamasan. “I pay the girl. We already decide on my tip for boom boom.” This is unacceptable to the mamasan who insists that I must pay the bar instead of the girl for sex. So I tell the mamasan, “Big boss tell me that I pay tip to the girl. Girl and I already decide how much I must pay her. Let me speak to the owner.”
“Owner not here now,” the mamasan tells me. You pay this much, which she’s showing me on my bin.” “Okay. I not take lady,” I tell the mamasan. I pay only my bin for drinks (which is about 1000 baht). I end up settling my bar bill of 1000 baht and promptly leave the place.

Two weeks later. There’s a shapely go go girl I’m attracted her who’s nearly five feet eight inches tall.  I’m pretty hot on her.  She’s sat with me a couple of times before.  Only a few days ago, I had talked to the bar owner again–this time about the incident where a mamasan horned in on my 1000 baht arrangement with one of his girls.  “Oh, we have a 1500 baht minimum” he told me.  This is because when a girl charges less for her tip the other girls get angry with her.  So to eliminate this problem all the girls must now charge at least 1500 baht.  I want the tall girl  so I’ve made up my mind that I will tip her 1500 baht.

As soon as I enter the go go bar another girl takes me inside and she’s very pretty.  But about the time the girl sits next to me, the tall girl comes up to us.  I  tell the new girl  “I love her too much,” while pointing at the 172 centimeter tall girl.  The new girl immediately backs off which leaves me with the object of my fondest desires. Billy Bob’s with me also and I’ve already told him, “I got a bad feeling about this one. I will pay her 1500 baht and not one baht more.  I think this is just another one of Pattaya clip joints.  Just like the ones on Walking Street.

Right off the girl asks me to buy her a tequila and an orange.

“What?” I ask her. You want two drinks? One orange and one tequila?

“No. Together,” she tells me.

I’m totally confused. Is she having a little orange mixed with her tequila?” I ask myself. “Because surely she’s not so greedy as to ask me to pay for two drinks at the same time.  This place is certainly starting to smell like all those other Pattaya clip joints ”

But I’m wrong. She’s that greedy. I order for myself a bottle of beer. My bar bill’s already 441 baht. I gotta get busy.

“You must sell 50 drinks in 10 days,” I ask her.

“Yes.”

“Bingo.”  Now I’m 100 percent certain that this is just another example of the  Pattaya clip joints that is ruining this city.  I got a coyote bar girl in my lap now,” I tell myself. “The number one species of vultures of all vultures here in Pattaya. That explains this place now.”

“So, if I buy you one ladies drink for 140 baht you keep the entire 140 baht?” I ask her.

“No. I sell 51 drinks then I get blah blah blah blah.”

I”m totally confused now. And I really don’t care. She’s a vulture and that’s all there is to it.

“I want another drink”

“Not yet. I want boom boom you. I give you 1500 baht short time. Okay?

“I want 2000 baht.”

“1500 baht. Okay. Other men in bar are tourists. I am khun Thai. I get discount so I pay you 1500 baht.”

I now pull out my wallet and show her my Thai driver’s license. “See, khun Thai. Not tourist.”

By now the waitress arrives to charge me for my drinks and bar fine. The waitress tells me, “You must pay her 2000 baht.”

“If she agrees with me for 1500 baht this is okay with Big Boss I tell the waitress. And this time the owner is there right across the room from us. I mention his name to the waitress.

“He not big boss,” the waitress tells me.

“Well who is?” I tell myself. Certainly not his Thai girlfriend. It is this falang who is paying the bills and not his destitute Thai girlfriend. But so it is with most of these Thais. Falang only must pay money. He have no rights. Dog is more important than him.”

The deal is off. This one’s a greedy bitch. Her ordering two drinks at the same time proves it. Would she have gone upstairs with me for 1500 baht had the waitress not interfered? Who knows. Call it 50-50. I tell the girl that I will be boom booming someone else within the next hour or so and that I will be paying the girl just 1000 baht.

She says: “You angry with me?”

“No,” I tell her. “Not angry. You very pretty lady but I never even pay as much as 1500 baht. I not same same as other customers in this bar”

So I leave and Billy Bobs still with me. Except I forgot to mention something. I’ve just done a huge favor for Billy Bob and he’s so happy that he’s already offered to pay for my boom boom with the tall lady. I had told Billy Bob that I would accept his offer but that I’d never pay the tall go go girl 2000 baht. Billy Bob then said it didn’t matter. He’d gladly pay 2000 baht for my boom boom. Or even more.

But I gots my pride. Billy Bob and I move onto another bar. It’s on Soi Six.

A pretty girl greets me at the bar entrance. She’s short whereas the go go girl was very tall for a Thai woman at just under five foot eight. This one’s barely over my waist. But she’s cute, and already she’s cuddling up next to me. Right off she gets me a beer and doesn’t even ask me for anything for herself. Within five minutes she’s massaging my dick and here she hasn’t even asked me for a drink.

I get her a drink. Because she deserves one. Plus, I will probably be boom booming her pretty soon so I want her to have enough alcohol in her so that she really feels like empowering my manhood. We have a couple drinks together while I’m getting this wonderful massage right where it counts, plus she’s kissing me all over my face. But such is life n the promised land.  This place is certainly not one of those infamous Pattaya clip joints

I take her upstairs, but so far I’ve only had to pay the 300 baht room charge that goes to the bar plus the drinks. She’s happy with my promise to pay her 1000 baht. She takes a shower in the room, then I take a shower. When I come out of the shower she’s already lying in the bed with her legs wide open inviting me in.

When we finally go back downstairs together Billy Bob’s still sitting where we had left him.

“Been waiting for long?” I ask Billy Bob.

“Only an hour and fifteen minutes,” he replies.

“You gotta be shitting me.”

“No. It might have even been longer.”

“We must have tried just about every position, and not just once but twice. And you know what, Billy Bob? I was thinking you the entire time. This means so much to me your paying for this fuck. I will treasure this moment for the rest of my life.”

That last example of the go go epidemic of Pattaya clip joints ripped me off for the last time. I’d rather go to a beer bar every time. Even if the girls are butt ugly, they are happy just to have me get them just one drink. And oftentimes they are massaging my back or legs while we are drinking together. Drinks are typically 90 baht. I even know of one beer bar where the gin and tonics are just 60 baht. And as for the Soi Six bars? Most of them are about 90 baht for a bottle of beer. And you aren’t getting high pressured to buy girls all those drinks. The goal of most of the girls on Soi Six is to convince you to take them upstairs as soon as they can get you in the mood. And once they do get you up there, their next goal is to make you so happy that you will be coming back to them again and again. So my advice to all of you reading these words of advice is to leave all the go go bars alone. With the possible exception that is when go go bar 1. Does not persistently hound you with all those coyote girl vultures and 2. Leaves it entirely between you and the girl what you agree on for her tip if you short time or long time her.

The Sequel to the go go bar between Sois 5 and 7

If one calls me a cheap charlie for tipping the first girl just 800 baht over a year ago, I have this to say. First…..After boom booming her several weeks later I sat at the bar alone where she joined me. I bought her a couple of drinks. Then I told her I was heading out to Walking Street. But she sat there in my arms, happy to be having a drink or two and in my company. Then she disappeared. Later when I was carousing with Billy Bob from one Walking Street go to to another a rather wholesome girl yelled out my name in the middle of Walking Street. So I walked back to her. The girl asked me to join her at a new go go in Walking Street she had just started working for. She looked very familiar to me, and she was just, nice. Not at all like most go go girls. I told her I’d see her soon and then Billy Bob and I went into Super Girls. I had just one beer there as I pondered where I had known the mystery girl from. And then it had dawned on me. She was the go go girl I had once boom boomed for 800 baht. After having just one beer at Super Girls I went joined my friend at the new go go bar where we had a few drinks together. She was having a birthday party the next week and I promised to visit her on her birthday. But when I went the next week, I never saw her at the bar. She was nice. Very nice. But when I asked her about why she had stopped working at the go go bar where I had boom boomed her she told me that she didn’t like the bar owner.  This girl was about as straight a girl as you will find in a go go bar.  So I figured she didn’t like working in the Pattaya clip joints

We now go back to only a couple of weeks ago. The tall girl had a sister working with her at her go go, which was complete bullshit I think. Anyways, we were all in that place together and two girls were sitting with Billy Bob and me. I had way too much tequila that night and so had the girl who was sitting with me. We were all sittin in front of this long stage where several girls were dancing in front of the long couch we were all sitting on. The sister got so drunk on tequila that she kept pulling my dick out of my shorts and showing it off to the girls dancing in front of us. But when I offered to take the girl upstairs, she refused. In fact she didn’t even offer me a price. Not 1000 baht. Not 2000 baht or even 5000 baht. She only told me that she hated the mamasan. So she and the girl sitting with Billy Bob started talking up a party to be held in my condo building. They were from Sattahip or Ban Serai. I figured this wasn’t going to be happening because it was a long say from Sattahip and my condo. But brother, was I wrong. Three times those two girls came to my condo building looking for me. And I can guarantee I’d be boom booming the girl who had kept playing with my dick for 1000 baht. And not just for short time. I mean long time. Anyways I don’t go around bringing just any girl up to my condo. That’s my private castle. So I wound up giving the entire thing a pass. And now I think both girls are over working upstairs at the Windmill down on Walking Street.

I have never seen a customer ever take a girl upstairs in that go go girl those girls used to work for. Not since I took that girl up there for 800 baht over a year ago. The place is  a one of many go go Pattaya clip joints.  And the smarter and more honorable girls know it. They aren’t likely to be staying there for very long.

The Thailand Naklua Pen Bar 10 year anniversary Dance-a-thon Video

Live music at the Naklua Pen Bar
From 7:30 until 1 a.m. live music ran non stop

The Thailand Naklua Pen Bar is celebrating its 10 year anniversary.  Tonight there’s live music and the girls are dancing.

The food was good and two of my buddies were drinking with me, one Austrian, the other British.  I started with Gin and Tonics but I was going through them very fast, and I could see my bin piling up with tickets.  This was going to be an expensive evening especially since I was buying several of the girls drinks.   No matter.  The Naklua Pen Bar doesn’t have its ten year anniversary every day.  And I wouldn’t miss this party for the world.  And it’s all because of Pen, who’s also having her annual birthday.

In England they call the hangouts for the locals pubs.  In my part of the U.S. we call them taverns.  In Pattaya Thailand we call it the Pen Bar.  That’s because all our favorite local bars have closed their doors or gone to seed.

Malai Bar never was the same after Eddie sold it to someone who had no clue on how to run a bar.  Then it closed.  It can be seen in the background of this video, vacant.  The Girl Beer Bar was the greatest place around with lots of pretty girls always around. Good music too.  But then the German owners had a falling out or that’s what I had heard.  As for Drinking Street, I’ve got lots of you tube videos that attest to how good it used to be there.  But most of the girls there have gotten to be fat and unattractive.  And Mam left, then Kwan.

But the Naklua Pen bar has been a steady watering hole of mine for ten years now.  Most of the bars near it are doing very badly.  Many have closed.  But Pen’s always got customers.  It’s Pen who’s made the big difference.

Pen used to be a bar girl.  She’s a straight shooter who will never overcharge a customer or tell him stories the way 90 percent of the bar girls do and nearly all the Thai bar owners and mamasans.  I now understand why Saint Thomas loved her bar so much.

Saint Thomas used to rent a condo on the 7th floor of my building.  He lived here full time for about a year,and during that year he bar fined something like 25 bar girls from Pen’s bar.  Then he moved back to the U.S., but he kept making visits to Naklua every three months or so.  He’d email me to tell Pen that he was coming to Pattaya on a certain night, and that she should stay open late, just for him.  He’d not even bother checking into his hotel first.  He’d just have the taxi driver from Bangkok take him straight to the Naklua Pen Bar, and he’d drop his bags off right next to his table where he’d start drinking right off.  Around three or four in the morning, he’d have Pen or her nephew drop him and his bags off at his hotel.

But tonight it was Rod’s turn.  Rod doesn’t own a motorcycle yet or a car because he hasn’t quite moved here full time quite yet.  So he took a taxi to meet us at the Naklua Pen Bar tonight.  Around 3 a.m. he had just about enough to drink, and was about to go out looking for a taxi.  So I advised him to have Pen get one of her bar girls to take him back to his condo on her motorcycle.  Which one of the girls did.  She was back at the bar ten minutes later.

And that’s how the Naklua Pen Bar gets so many loyal customers.

Links to other Naklua Pen Bar Videos

Tri and Pai, two of our favorite Girl Beer Bar Girls cut up at the Pen Bar

Per and Jack get marooned at the Pen Bar by unrelenting rain where they are molested by rampaging bar girls

bar-girl-videos

 

Drinking Street Kwan performs at Pattaya Soi Eight Best Bar

Kwan Drinking Street star on Wongamat Beach
We kick off May May’s birthday at the Pullman Hotel. It’s Wednesday night, and it’s all you can drink and eat for three hours. We will be well primed when we hit the Best Bar on Pattaya Soi Eight.
Johannes at Wongamat Beach
When I sense a great video’s about to happen, I really want Johannes to be there

At the Best Bar, Drinking Street Kwan asks me,  “Do you think they will let me dance here?”

Drinking Street Kwan debuts at the Best Bar
Our little corner of the world went wild when she got up on the stage of a bar she had never been to before

We get the go ahead from one of the girls tending the bar, and then I tell Fon who had been taking English classes with Kwan.  “Now you will really see something.”  I know what

Drinking Street Kwan with Johannes
See what I mean? When it comes to making movies Johannes is better than Brando

Kwan can do and she’s in the mood.  My camera is small, but it’s got a Leica 1.4 lens with image stabilization.  This is one of the finest cameras in the world for shooting in low light and this bar is darker than most cameras can handle.  The music’s da da, or butt awful.

Drinking Street Kwan stands head and shoulders above the crowd
Kwan is deceptively tall. She’s 166 centimeters which makes her taller than the average American woman

But Drinking Street Kwan is sexier than ever before.  And my camera does not let me or Kwan down.  But the music’s just not good enough.  I must create a miracle–a soundtrack that is worthy of what we can do together.   I don’t know if I’ve succeeded or not so I will let you be the judge.

bar-girl-videos

Pattaya bar owner shot to death

Looking Glass Magazine August 2006 Pattaya Bar owner of the month shot to death

I just heard about it last night. But when this appears in Google the story will read Pattaya Bar owner shot to death. But this wasn’t just any bar owner. The woman who was killed was ED, former owner of the Malai Bar in Naklua which I had awarded the Looking Glass Magazine Bar of the month in August 2006. My girlfriend at that time was Ed’s niece and Ed’s niece lived with me for a year and seven months. So it should have been no surprise that we went to the Malai Bar quite often back then. In those days in my opinion, the Malai Bar was the best managed bar in the area. It had the best music. It had a good crowd. And very seldom was it boring.

I remember the first time I came into the Malai Bar. I had been drinking with a Scot at T.J. Bar across the parking lot from the Malai Bar, and I noticed that this bar I had never set foot in before had a big crowd, so I said to the Scot, “Let’s check that place out.” As soon as we came into the bar, Ed came up to me and said, “Thank you so much for coming into my bar. Can I buy you a drink?”

The second thing that happened to me was a pretty Thai lady came up to me, took me by my hand and escorted me to a bar stool. Then she sat next to me. The shapely Thai woman would become my girlfriend.

Ed was never boring. Sometimes she’d buy me a drink. Other times she’d ask for one. She’d get up and dance on the bar. Oftentimes she appeared to be drunk and totally out of control. I think she usually pretended to be drunk. Outstanding showmanship on many levels earmarked her bar as something very special in those days and I think a “drunken ED” was part of her master plan.

I used to shoot a lot of pictures and video at the Malai Bar. But the best night of them all was when Ed put on her birthday party. She already had a good looking group of girls working for her. But that was not good enough for ED. One just had to know ED to really appreciate how outstanding she was at running a bar. For her birthday she brought in a group of girls from Sattahip and had them dancing with her bar girls. That night ED had an exceptional group of very attractive Thai bar girls performing for her, and at the end ED got up on the pole herself.

After a year and seven months my girlfriend and I split up and I stopped going to the Malai Bar. Something like a year and a half later I met my present girlfriend and I took her to a heavily advertised Pattaya Bar that had been touting itself as the number one nightclub for music.

The drinks were expensive there and the band sucked rotten eggs. The distaste in my mouth was so bad that I decided I had to take my girlfriend to a place where I knew the music would be good. And the bar I had in mind was Ed’s place. So I took my girlfriend into the Malai Bar and we kept going there for many months. The band was still as good as always and Ed had not lost her considerable charm.

And then the bar was sold to someone else. One man in the band quit and not long after that the drummer quit as well. The rumor was that Ed lost the bar because she had a gambling problem. We stopped going there.

I learned just last night that ED was shot to death somewhere near Nong Nooch Botanical Garden. The other bar owner told me that ED owed too many people too much money, could not repay her debts and that was that.

ED might have not been able to manage her money but she sure was one helluva bar owner. She had three men playing at the Malai Bar and from what Ed’s niece told me she paid each man a lot of money. Perhaps far too much money and more than nearly any other bar owner would have been willing to part with. Her bar centered around music and it brought in a lively crowd. Those were the days.

There’s several videos I did at the Malai Bar that you can get to through my links above. And no, they are not on my you tube channel. For one thing the little Canon I used in those days to shoot video was nowhere close to what my Panasonic LX 7 can do. You will notice that there is an extreme qualitative difference between my earlier You Tube videos and those I have done recently. Part of the reason is that in recent years we have been experiencing much faster internet speeds here in Pattaya than previously. So I’ve been able to shoot and upload huge video files and put those on the You tube server which can handle such large video files far better than anything I’ve worked with before. And of course, that new camera is simply outstanding.

The Song Pattaya Pattaya in video at the Naklua Pen Bar

The song Pattaya Pattaya in video at the Naklua Pen Bar captures the essence of the most fun city on the planet.

Meet Pie, Tree and Pudcha. They will do most of the dancing for you. These three were Jack’s favorite Pattaya bar girls at the Girl Beer Bar until it changed hands, then closed. But Pen, one of Jack Corbett’s favorite bar owners, is still going strong in Naklua, and Pen’s having a knock down blow out party. Jack and his girlfriend decide to invite Pie and give her an offer she cannot refuse, “The drinks are on us. Join us.” But Jack knows that once Pie starts drinking, she becomes a non stop dancing machine. He’s got his video camera ready. The real icing on the cake becomes apparent when Tree comes to the Pen Bar party with Pie. Tree’s as cute as they come. Neither of them are bar girls working for Pen. But Pudcha is and Pudcha used to work with Tree and Pie at the Girl Beer Bar.

The video starts off early with one of the Pen Bar Girls dancing on a table top out in the middle of the rain. Oblivious to how wet she gets drenched she dances to the rain drops. There’s a good crowd here tonight. And the band is playing the song Pattaya Pattaya.

Pie is her abby-normal whacked out self, and Pudcha’s shaking a tail feather like never before. The tequila’s flowing. And Tree starts to find her real elemental self. Now I don’t know why this video’s been red flagged by you tube. Something about content inappropriate for minors but for the life of me I don’t understand why. Is it because of Pudcha’s shaking her little derriere and this is considered to be overly sexy? Or is it Tree who’s at fault? Tree, giving the inky night sky the bird. Tree is irreverent as all get out as she pokes fun at the world. Pretty little Tree, she’s the girl in the white t shirt, so full of fun so full of life.

You must be an adult to see this video. Over on you tube viewers must sign in with their email address or so it seems. Personally I think it should be on the family channel. Also….in the main published video on You Tube the aspect is all wrong so the girls seem a lot fatter than they are in real life. And that’s the main reason why I’m republishing it.

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Pattaya girls dancing for fun

Pattaya girls dancing for fun video tops 648,000 views because it realistically captures the ambiance of the beer bar experience.  Yet so far the irony of this videos success has never been told.

The video took place at the Skytop Guesthouse and Internet cafe on 2nd Road just one block from Pattaya’s famous Soi Six.  Jack Corbett’s best friend, an Australian named Pete had owned the place.  Unfortunately Pete died leaving the business to his widow, Wan.  But Jack had lived for 11 months across the guest house’s hallway from Pete and Wan.  He had watched two key employers and the condo’s cleaning woman quit in the same week and Pete could barely turn a computer on.  And Pete was in and out of hospitals due to severe health problems that would later kill him.  It was all up to Wan.  Jack Watched her clean the entire place single-highhandedly while she picked up the computer skills that are essential to running an internet cafe.  Because of  Wan’s skilled management and hard work the business prospered.  She made two partitions out of the internet cafe on the 1st floor and rented out one of them to Geogio, a Burmese tailor of unprecedented talent while leaving the other partition as the internet cafe.  Then she started up a beer bar in front of the internet cafe which she ran with the help of her younger sister.

Being great friends of both Pete and Wan Jack could run riot with his cameras.  After Pete died, he took Wan and his girlfriend over to a Soi 8 bar that had the hottest beer bar girls on the soi dancing non stop.  Jack had always found this bar to be jam packed with customers so he said to Wan:  “Wan, you really should consider having a dancing marathon at your Skytop bar.  You could have try outs on a weekly basis, say every Wednesday night and then once a month you could have a special contest with a cash reward.  Say 3000 or 4000 baht for the best dancer of the month. If you got the word out you’d have some of the hottest Pattaya girls competing against each other.  Meanwhile you could limit the contestants to only those who had made it through your weekly tryouts.”

Wan replied, “Jack, the hottest Pattaya girls are not worth anything.  All their lives they’ve been told how pretty they are, so they become lazy knowing they can have anything without working.  They do what they want, they show up for work only when they feel like it.  I don’t want them working in my bar.”

No truer words have been spoken.  Jack had thought the same way back in the U.S. while taking pictures of hundreds of strippers and feature entertainers.  But now Wan’s words had really sunk in.  From then on, he looked at Pattaya girls in a way that was not new.  He had thought the same way before, but Wan’s words kept nagging at him whenever he went into a go go bar.  He’d keep asking himself while observing them gyrating around the stage:  “Can she cook?  Can she get out of bed in the morning?  Can she give a good massage?  Just how money hungry is she?   Is she a real bitch once you get to know her?  Can she read a book or do things by herself while I’m busy writing my next book or editing a video, or will she always want to go out at night spending a lot of money and doing things behind my back that I don’t want her to be doing?  Can she hold onto her money?  Is she a spendthrift who’s throw away all the money she could ever make or that was given to her?”

Going to the go go bars never was the same again.

But when it comes to Pattaya girls, Wan had actually been a bar girl and that’s where Pete had met her, at a beer bar.  And yet, she had turned out to be an incredibly hard working woman.  She had also become an excellent long term thinker and planner even though it’s commonly known that most Pattaya girls only think short term and that bar girls are short on education with a 6th grade education being all too typical.

Most of the Pattaya girls in this video worked for Wan’s beer bar for years.  She had scarcely any turnover at all, which is perhaps the most solid evidence of  Wan’s management competence.  This video captures the true spirit and sense of fun that can be had by all in a well managed beer bar.   You can see Wan hamming it up throughout the video with the girls and her customers urging everyone on, which is one of the main reasons for this video’s success.  For a two week period it had been averaging over 6000  views a day until you tube decided to put age restrictions on it for whatever reason its moderation team had come up to keep it out of sight of under aged viewers.

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Best Pattaya entertainer is Kwan on Drinking Street

She’s not found in a Pattaya go go bar.  The best Pattaya entertainer we’ve found is Kwan on Drinking Street.  Which just goes to show that some of the best gems are to be found in beer bars, but you have to look harder to find them.  So just how good is Pattaya entertainer Kwan?  Let me put it this way.  She’s the only Thai girl I’ve found here who I’d put on the same level as the best feature entertainers I’ve met in America.  And I’ve known lots of the best feature entertainers in the United States.  This is no idle boast.  Just check out the Hall of Fame pages on my alphapro web site or buy Extreme Guns and Babes for an Adult World, which features over

2004 Xtreme Weapons Calendar
In 2004 Xtreme Magazine, a gun owner friend, and I produced the Xtreme Girls with Xtreme Weapons calendar. While writing gun articles for Xtreme Magazine I could choose just about any weapons I wanted to write about and virtually guarantee any topless dancer or feature entertainer free publicity in the article I’d write for Xtreme Magazine.

twenty-five weapons for my “Xtreme” gun articles.  Back in those days I routinely traveled with feature entertains across the United States, stayed at the same hotels with them, often roomed with one of the stars, had them stay with me in my apartment for weekends for photo shoots.  Above all, I was lucky enough to have been given the chance to do articles about them for Xtreme and other adult magazines.  When I wrote an article about an American  feature entertainer, the first thing I’d do was to focus on what made this particular adult star different from the rest.  I’d keep asking myself, “What is this girl’s finest attributes that make her such a great entertainer?”  For me, that was the key.  With Kwan, I keep asking questions such, “Why do my friends and I like her so much?  Why is this Pattaya entertainer so exciting?  How would this Pattaya entertainer stack up against America’s most successful feature entertainers?Kwan clicks all the right boxes.   Watch her, just watch her, and not just for one night.  Go to Drinking Street and check out who’s dancing and how much time is each Pattaya bar girl spending on the stage.  One girl will impress you, but it’s just for one night.  You might not see her for the rest of the week.  Or if you do see her, she’s taking the easy way out doing practically everything except dancing.  But you will see Kwan putting in a lot of hours dancing on the stage, then you come back the next night and there she is again.

Who makes more money for a bar?   The girl who’s always up on center stage putting both herself and her bar in the limelight, or the wall flower who’s too busy chatting up her bar girl friends than to get up and showcase her talent?  Kwan is tall, being five foot six without her heels.  She dances on the bar’s stage and she dances on the bar.  When she does, she’s visible from all the other Drinking Street bars.  There’s no doubt who’s the superstar of Drinking Street.  That’s how I found her.  I saw this tall slender girl dancing across the room from me, and I thought to myself, “That girl is one helluva dancer.  I must go over and meet her.”

The best American feature entertainers are not stand offish.  And now it’s about time to explain the difference between a feature entertainer and a house dancer.  In America’s topless and strip clubs the dancers you normally encounter there are house dancers.  They are employed by the club, and it is their job to work their shifts night after night for that particular club.  A feature entertainer is as her name suggests someone who is featured by the club that has hired her.  Her performances are typically scheduled for three or five successive nights.  She is paid for each featured show, say $200 per show.  She might perform three shows a night over the period of time she has contracted for.  Feature entertainers are typically represented by a professional talent agency such as Pure Talent.  The agency will typically get a booking fee of 15 %.  A good agency will make sure that each feature entertainer it represents gets paid the entire contracted amount once she has delivered on her shows.  It will make sure that her travel expenses are reimbursed by the night club.  Such travel expenses will almost always include the feature entertainer’s hotel expenses.  A feature entertainer will typically travel all across the United States to perform for those clubs she has contracted with.  The clubs will typically promote and advertise her heavily by signs and posters in the club, in neon lights across the building by the club’s entrance, in newspapers, radio and sometimes on television.  Getting the largest amount of publicity possible is the name of the game for both the club and the visiting feature entertainer.  So what does all this have to do with Kwan who’s just a Pattaya entertainer?  Kwan more than any other Thai bar girl I’ve ever met knows that publicity is terrific both for her and whatever bar she’s working for.

Believe it or not, I was once chased down by a security guard while shooting video of the girls dancing in a Drinking Street Bar.  The girls didn’t want their video taken so they had complained to Drinking Street security.  Another time I sat in a Drinking Street bar drinking my beer while shooting video of one of the girls dancing on the stage.  She was fine with that for about a minute or two and then she rudely made a sign as if she were cutting her own throat thus signifying to me her displeasure and that she had had enough with the publicity I was giving her.  The behavior both times was that of country bumpkins.  And as for the mamasans or whoever it was who was managing the two bars, nothing could be more stupid than chasing away a good photographer who could make her bar famous all over the internet.  From the first time I met her, Kwan would tell me, “Shoot all the video you can of me, and when you get done, shoot more.”  That’s the difference between a true professional and a country bumpkin.

One of the primary reasons so many bar girls do not want pictures or video shot of them while working in the bars is they have boyfriends who are sending them money on the understanding that they will be “good girls” and quit working in a bar.  However, and here everyone needs to read what I’m writing and believe every single word of it–when a bar girl promises to quit working in a bar once her Western boyfriend starts sending her 10,000 or 15,000 baht a month, chances are she’s going to keep working in the bar anyway.  Either that or she will be off picking up paying customers in Pattaya discos.  For most bar girls, there is no such thing as having enough money.  Having their video taken and put up on you tube and social networking web sites such as facebook proves to their gullible boyfriends that they are still working in the bar.

But Kwan is a pure Pattaya entertainer who is worthy to be included among the ranks of America’s finest feature entertainers.  Let me show how true this comparison holds.  When a feature entertainer contracts say for $200 a show for five nights of shows at three shows a night, this means she’s getting paid $3000 plus her travel expenses.   But when she’s not actually on the stage performing her shows, she’s selling her merchandise to the club’s customers, and she’s having her pictures taken with the customers at so much a picture.  She’s also oftentimes getting tips while performing her shows.  But whether she’s selling key chains with her picture on them or pictures, the customers aren’t wanting to buy much from her if she wasn’t in adult magazines or if she hadn’t been crowned M.S. Texas or Miss Nude Illinois.  And it really helps to be the Penthouse Pet of the Month.  Unfortunately for Kwan, she wasn’t lucky enough to have been born in the U.S. where the big money in night club entertainment lies.  But she knows that the more people that see her performing on you tube, the more customers will be coming to her bar to watch her perform, buy her drinks (she makes a commission on each one that she sells), and perhaps even to take her out of the bar.

This Pattaya entertainer could care less how many people know she’s working for a bar or what her boyfriends might think of her.  I’ve met a couple of her boyfriends during the past year.  She brings them right into the bar, then she comes over and drinks with my friends and me, and given a little time she’s right up on the stage again dancing like the energy bunny.  I’m sure she tells all the guys, boyfriend or not, “This is what I do.  I am what I am.  And I am damn good at it.”

Ask me why I shoot so much video of Kwan.  She’s the only real professional Pattaya entertainer I know.  And like some of the best feature entertainers I’ve come to know in the United States, in spite of her obvious gift for showing off and being full of herself, down at her inner core she’s very down to earth and so much fun to be around.  I love Thai women.  For me they are the most beautiful women in the world.  But the American feature entertainers I had the pleasure of getting to know were simply fabulous company to be around.  I cannot begin to describe how much I’ve come to miss them.  So for me it’s a real breath of fresh air to find someone who reminds me of them.

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Thai girl lady boy can you tell the difference?

Thai girl lady boy can you tell the difference?  At Pattaya TG Bar  we are betting you’d call her a girl.  Her voice was a woman’s.  She danced like a woman without all the extra motions and show most lady boys put on.  Even my Thai girlfriend couldn’t tell if she was a Thai girl or lady boy.  If you took her out in public everyone would take her for a lady.  The tip off was she was working at TG Bar in Naklua where nearly every good looking lady you see is a lady boy.  She didn’t stay there for long so other than asking her if we could put her in a video, we never even talked to her. Thai girl lady boy?  Sometimes it’s difficult to call.

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Pattaya Lady Boys and us at Naklua TG Bar

Pattaya Lady Boys and us at Naklua TG Bar is just a typical evening for Jack Corbett, two of his German buddies, Luddy and Michael and Robby Liverpool’s Don Juan.  Our girlfriends are with us, May May and Luck–that is Luddy’s and mine while Robby’s romancing one of the few real bar girls at TG’s.  The rest are Pattaya lady boys.  TG’s is widely known in Naklua Thailand as a Pattaya Lady Boy Bar.  Aside from our girlfriends, if you see a good looking Thai girl in this video, she’s one of the quieter Pattaya Lady Boys.  Our gang is all from the same condo building at Wongamat Beach, and TG Bar is just a favorite neighborhood pub to us.  As for MIchael, he’s in the background, barely seen in this video.  Does he have really have a thing for Pattaya Lady Boys?  One of the Pattaya Lady boys is sitting next to him.  The question is, does he bar fine her?

A strange thing occurs once a man has lived in Pattaya very long.  Pattaya Lady boys become accepted as just part of the scenery.  Oftentimes called Thailand’s third sex, many men even develop a preference for Pattaya Lady Boys over women.  I once asked one of TG’s owners why so many men go with Pattaya Lady boys.  She responded:  “Many men really get burned by a Pattaya bar girl and even if they don’t, most Pattaya bar girls express little real interest in them.  But most Pattaya Lady boys take very good care of such men.

I once asked one of my fellow co-owners in my condo building, “Before you started going with Pattaya Lady Boys when you were living in England, did you realize then that you were a homosexual?”

The man replied.  “I never even thought of being with a man.  Liking Pattaya lady boys and being a homosexual are two different things.”

I have often seen friends of mine go into a bar full of Pattaya Lady Boys and watch them kissing the lady boys, while being groped between their legs.  These are not men who enjoy having sex with men.  These are men who have Thai women as their steady live in girl friends.  If they really preferred Pattaya Lady boys to their girlfriends they’d be living with them instead.

I can just imagine Eddie who had been a combat U.S. Marine in Vietnam telling his fellow Marines, “Yeah, I’d go with a guy.”  Back in those days, he’d rather slit his own throat than even admit that he’d come within three feet of one of a guy even if he was a lady boy.  But I’ve seen Eddie, now in his sixties, kissing Pattaya Lady boys on more than one night out with the guys.

If a man thinks about it hard enough, Pattaya Lady boys can be a real mind bender when it comes to one’s sexual identity and preferences.  Two weeks ago, one of my friends asked me to visit him in his condo.  I had two American men with me.  One was interested in either buying or renting a condo similar to Bill’s.  When we arrived at Bill’s condo, Bill took my two friends onto his balcony where the three men got into a long discussion about renting or buying condos at Wongamat Beach.  I was left in the living room with Amy, who was the main reason Bill wanted us to come to his condo in the first place.

Amy is not Thai.  She’s Cambodian.  Notice also that I just referred to Amy as she.  Bill would like to take Amy with him to the United States, and after hearing that my Thai girlfriend recently managed to get a visa for an upcoming visit to the U.S. in August, Jim had asked me on the phone if I could give Amy advice on how we had managed talking the U.S. Embassy into giving my girlfriend a visitor’s visa.  Amy’s English was excellent.  But the more I talked to Amy about her getting a U.S. visa the more obvious it became to me that her chances of getting one were slim to none.  But I liked Amy immensely.  She was far more interesting and perceptive to talk with than over ninety-five percent of the Thai women I’ve met.  Amy was also extremely attractive.

The question is “would I do her?”  Yes.  Absolutely. Except for two reasons.  1. I already had a Thai girlfriend and 2.  I’d never move in on a friends territory and Amy was after all Bill’s.

In my conversation with Amy I found her to be very direct and willing to discuss just about anything without a hint of shyness.  So I asked her, “Have you been cut?”

Amy replied:  “Yes, I have.”

So Amy no longer had a dick.  Was she a woman after all?

“Did it hurt an awful lot?” I asked Amy as I cringed holding onto my groin as if someone were about to take a straight razor to my penis.

“Yes.  It hurt so much that I couldn’t even walk for a month.”  I didn’t ask myself how Amy could get around, if getting around only amounted to a one hundred meter stroll for a pack of cigarettes–I was so busy still imagining having my own penis cut off while still clutching my own penis.

“Well, you can’t get any lubrication, can you?” I asked Amy.  “At least not any lubrication that’s coming out of you.”

“No I can’t.  I need to put something on,” Amy replied.

“Do you really enjoy sex?  Do you come?” I asked.

“Yes.  I really enjoy and yes, I do come.”

“I’d do Amy in a heartbeat.  She was just so perceptive, so Intelligent, and so direct without a hint of self consciousness about her.

I think almost any man reading this post would want to have sex with Amy.  Along with all her other killer assets, she had a beautiful body–a woman’s body.  But suppose she had a dick?  She’s already got breasts and she’s admitted to taking hormone medication.

Here’s a slide show for you.  I entitled it Thailand’s Third sex.  It’s of one of the Pattaya lady boys I met at the Leo Blues Bar here in Naklua.  She was the best looking and most personable bar girls in the bar, and I wound up paying her a thousand baht for the photo shoot.  The lady boys got silicon enhanced breasts.

Amazing Thailand.  Now you see it.  Now you don’t.  It’s a land of smoke and mirrors where your greatest fantasies can come true.

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